I hit a pretty low point last night... scared my family a little - I'm the first in the family to do a lot of things - first to finish all my schooling in Australia, first to travel and live overseas by myself ... first to have a complete mental breakdown.... Well anyway, it resulted in me pouring my heart out to a complete stranger on the phone for just over an hour... crisis diverted... for now.
So what are the next steps? ... I umm don't really know... I guess I'll just go with the flow on this one. I had a blood test to get my hormones checked - the results for that one should come in next week.... maybe they can give me MORE drugs to try and fix the problem... but regardless, we all know this isn't just a physical problem... my mind is tired, my heart is broken and there are 3 major reasons for it - and they are all linked... so I guess I need to tackle one of the links and hopefully initiate a positive chain reaction.
Then I need to find the happy strand... does anyone know where it is? I seem to have lost mine. Well if I take this journey nice and slow... and thoroughly check every crevice I will eventually find it and when I do... i'm gonna hold that effing thing so tight so the little bugger wont escape me again. Til then... deep breaths
1 comment:
OHH Thara I know you're going through some tough times and I'm glad that no matter what you are still holding on and trying to stay strong.
Just know that no matter what I will (and others) will always be there...doesnt matter what crazy thought of feeling or action that you do.
mwa love u
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